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Leading Beyond the Boardroom: Ways We Can Lead with Our Family and Friends

J.P. Montalvan • March 11, 2024
"Leadership is possible in all different ways, and in all different areas of life. Whether it is with friends or family, I expect them to set a great example for me, and hopefully I will do the same for them. All that is all part of being a leader."
— Steve Nash,
Sports owner, professional basketball player and coach 
photo courtesy of Adamgregor

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Leading Beyond the Boardroom: Leadership with Our Family and Friends

As I sit here late at night in my parent’s family room, a few hours away from our home, thinking about you, it dawns on me that we’re often wrapped up with how leadership impacts us in the work world. But the reality is that it permeates every part of our lives – and especially our relationships with family and friends. 

This weekend, the conversations with my parents are covering a myriad of topics, from advice on navigating parenthood with our newborn daughter to discussing strategies for managing their health. 

After talking about baby nighttime fussiness, my mother shared with me about how “tummy time” for my brother, my sister and I really helped to tire us out when we were little, making the nighttime more manageable. She came up with some ideas on how we could do it this weekend. As she talked about her knee and asked about mine, I shared with her more about my experiences with knee surgeries and rehab how she might think about knees. Same with my father — after talking about eye health, I shared what it was like when I underwent Lasik surgery and the incredible advances in eye surgery even as he faces one himself.

Sure, we could look at these conversations as ordinary. But we’re really leading each other through these shared thoughts and experiences. It's a reminder that our leadership extends far beyond our workplaces.

This quarter, as I delve deeper into my work with our Leadership Circle, I'm emphasizing the importance of our "Big 3" priorities. These are the three crucial areas that, when given daily and weekly attention, bridge the gap between our current reality and what we really want for our lives. But when we’re faced with challenging work or a turbulent economy – or both – how can we prioritize a “Big 3” around our family and friends, nurturing meaningful connections with the people we love in a way that gives them time on our center stage? 

Here are 3 key ways I’m thinking about right now for fostering growth and fulfillment in what I call the “People” sphere of our lives:

Communicate. Actively listen to understand rather than to respond. Ask questions that allow for discovery first and foremost. Engage in open, honest conversations, and create a safe space for your loved ones to express their thoughts and feelings.

Empower. Support and encourage personal growth and development in your inner circle. Provide guidance when needed, but emphasize empowering them to make their own decisions and learn from both their experiences as well as the experiences of others.

Be Present. Be fully present in moments spent with family and friends. Put away the phone and other distractions, actively engage in activities together, and cherish the precious moments shared. Remember, it's the quality not quantity of time that matters most.

Incorporating these principles into my interactions with loved ones is really strengthening how I feel in my relationships. I see it as tied to cultivating a culture of leadership within our inner circles. 

What are you doing to lead with your family and friends right now? I’d love to hear from you. In the meantime, let’s imagine a world where we inspire growth and create deeper connections that transcend the boundaries of our boardrooms and office spaces.
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